How To Be a Better Listener

It was my Dad who taught me how to be a good listener. I must have been in grade 7 when I experimented with a classmate after ballet class and I just sat there and listened to my friend relate stories about how her day went & episodes about her boyfriend. I could not really relate to everything she was saying but I mustered strength to listen and give her encouragement to talk. At the end of the conversation, or what seemed more like a monologue, she said, "Boy, it was really great talking to you!" I hardly said anything! She really did all the talking.

I don't think I gained much from the content of what she said. But, that day, I discovered the secret of making another human being feel important and valued simply by listening well. I listened not only with my ears but also with my eyes, my gestures, and my heart. I knew my friend considered me a friend for life. More importantly, I gained the priceless lesson of learning how to empathize with others and enter into their hurts. Because of that, I also gained the right to speak into her life because she knew I cared.

People can tell when our lines are lip service. People can read between the lines. People can feel when the sympathy is real. People can also hear what we're not saying.

If we all listen, really listen, we would certainly have a less-wounded world.